IC contact for wethelost

[devoutish]

Solomons & Melborn
1108 Sweet Cream Street

[Feel free to use this space for letter/package deliveries as well as visits/knocks on the front door!]

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[bywolves]

[ He noses a bit against Alfie's nose, going kind of quiet for a moment. He's repeating it in his head - you're all right, Gwen's all right. He's not sure if he regrets killing Merrick, either. ]

You saw what I did, after. [ Arson, lots of murder. You know. ]

[devoutish]

Yes.

[He pulls Royce closer, his hold secure. He saw, and he doesn't blame him for any of it.]

[bywolves]

I knew Merrick didn't kill her. [ He sounds sort of distant - not quite the way he used to in Norfinbury. But he's putting some space between him and it, trying to sort through it. ]

[devoutish]

[But his actions still led to her death, is what Alfie thinks and doesn't say. He knows that Royce knows that he's thinking it, or something like it - but this is still Royce's conundrum to sort through, and Alfie won't give direct input unless he's asked for it. He just squeezes him tighter.]

[bywolves]

But it didn't matter. [ He murmurs. ] Arcadius hired him to do it. He took the job. He knew what the consequences would be.

You know - he said he wanted to work with me again someday. But he didn't know who I was, when he said it. Not anymore.

[devoutish]

He cared about you only as far as you could be useful to him. You did the right thing, moving on from him.

[bywolves]

Yeah. I know. [ Royce turns his face to hide it against Alfie's neck. ] Even in the end he just wanted to save his own skin.

[ But even so. Even so, he misses what he had. ]

[devoutish]

And I'm sorry for that, too.

[Alfie murmurs into Royce's hair.]

[bywolves]

I think I am, too.

[devoutish]

You deserve better. You deserve Hadrian.

[bywolves]

I don't think he deserved me. [ Royce says, with a hint of lightness to it. It's just a little self-deprecation. ]

[devoutish]

Well, you know what I think of that.

[bywolves]

I do. [ Another long pause. ] You're the first person I've ever shown that to.

[devoutish]

I know. I'm glad you were able to come out of it quickly.

[He'd been pretty worried, at first.]

[bywolves]

Having you here helped even more than I thought it would. And - you pulled me off the bridge. I wasn't expecting it to be you.

[devoutish]

I would never have let you fall, Royce.

[bywolves]

I know you wouldn't have. [ He shifts, pressing their foreheads against each other again. ] I mean it was Hadrian, before. Seeing you made me remember it was a memory.

[devoutish]

Come lie down.

[Alfie murmurs, and if Royce lets him, he'll tug him down onto the mattress.]

Writing to Gwen will help as well, yeah?

[bywolves]

[ He sinks down with Alfie, limbs loose and limp. ]

Yeah. I wish I could see her. [ He swallows hard, trying not to picture the blood on the snow. ] I haven't - I haven't missed her this badly in a while.

[devoutish]

I wish I could send you to her.

[He says, pulling the blanket up to their chins.]

[bywolves]

I want to bring her to us. [ He says, voice faltering slightly. He burrows again, hiding his face. ]

[devoutish]

[If only that could happen now. Alfie just pulls him close, rubbing circles on his back.]

[bywolves]

[ It relaxes him, though. It relaxes him a lot, and slowly, he sinks into Alfie's hold and into the inflatable mattress. ]

I want to sleep here, I think.

[devoutish]

I thought as much. Are you tired?

[bywolves]

Yeah. [ He says, with a sigh. ] Mostly I don't want to sail.