IC contact for wethelost

[devoutish]

Solomons & Melborn
1108 Sweet Cream Street

[Feel free to use this space for letter/package deliveries as well as visits/knocks on the front door!]

Comments

[devoutish]

It's not the death she'd be reassuring you about, it's the reasons behind it.

[bywolves]

[ He brings his knees to his chest, arms around his legs. ]

The reason was me. Whether or not what Arcadius thought was true, she died because of me, Alfie.

[devoutish]

[Firmly:]

No, Royce, she did not.

[bywolves]

[ He stays quiet this time, chewing his tongue. ]

[devoutish]

Yeah. He was the selfish one; he wanted to keep your daughter.

[bywolves]

For the good of Elan. [ He mutters. ] It was supposed to be for the greater good. He didn't want her. Just wanted her to lead.

[devoutish]

Which he thought she wouldn't do if she went off with you.

[bywolves]

She wouldn't have. I would've left. I would've taken Mercy and Gwen and run - we were going to do that. He stopped us.

[devoutish]

I know, and he didn't want that. It had nothing to do with you not being good enough.

[bywolves]

[ His jaw works. ]

He killed Gwen because he wanted to mold Mercy into a perfect ruler, and he couldn't do it with me. I was ruined, so he had to start over. If I hadn't been ruined --

[devoutish]

If he thought you were ruined, then he did not fucking know you.

[bywolves]

[ Royce goes quiet. He slides one hand up and into his hair and lets out a long, unsteady sigh. ]

I wish I was as certain as you.

[devoutish]

I wish you could see yourself how I see you.

[bywolves]

I've been trying to.

[devoutish]

I know. Shame we can't put you in my head for a bit.

[bywolves]

[ He rests his head against Alfie's shoulder again. ]

Maybe we should ask Zephyr to let us try, sometime. [ That is mostly a joke. ]

[devoutish]

[Alfie flops a hand onto Royce's hair, petting it lazily.]

Would you want to?

[bywolves]

[ As always, he very much enjoys the petting. ]

... Maybe. [ If Alfie would, anyway. ]

[devoutish]

You don't worry there would be things you wouldn't want to see?

[He says it lightly, but.]

[bywolves]

What sort of things? [ A beat. ] You know you'd likely face the same issue with me, if you were to be in my head.

[devoutish]

I can't think of anything I wouldn't want to see in yours.

[He quirks a brow.]

But I suppose you'd say the same about mine.

[bywolves]

[ He watches Alfie with a softer sort of look. ]

Yeah. You're right.

[devoutish]

[He hesitates for a moment.]

I don't want you seeing the bad bits and pitying me for them.

[bywolves]

It'd be that way for both of us.

I don't want you to remember Manzant the way I do, but I would let you.

[devoutish]

[Alfie would squeeze his hand right now, but he's afraid that the emotion welling up in him would make him squeeze it too hard by accident.]

I want to remember it the way you do. I've seen it, but that's different. I want to fully understand.