IC contact for wethelost

[devoutish]

Solomons & Melborn
1108 Sweet Cream Street

[Feel free to use this space for letter/package deliveries as well as visits/knocks on the front door!]

Comments

[devoutish]

Do you?

[bywolves]

Rationally, I know. [ Royce mutters, with a sigh. ]

[devoutish]

You've told Gwen about this, yeah?

[bywolves]

[ ... fffffffffffffffff ]

What part?

[devoutish]

Arcadius. What he did and why.

[bywolves]

No. [ Shift, shift. ] I didn't. I haven't.

[devoutish]

[Alfie angles his head downwards a little more, trying to get a look at his face.]

Does she know that she died?

[bywolves]

[ He looks a little upset. ]

Yeah. She knows. But she doesn't know how it happened. [ A beat. ] She came from another place like we did. She won't talk about it, but. She said she remembers dying, and waking up in that place.

[devoutish]

Do you not want to tell her because you don't want to upset her more, then?

[bywolves]

It hasn't come up. And I don't want to upset her.

[devoutish]

[Royce, that's a hell of a big thing to just "not come up", but okay.]

I think it's something she could reassure you about, as well.

[bywolves]

[ He basically said "I don't know" and then just never brought it up again and avoided it. ]

I don't want her to have to reassure me about her death. Same way I don't want you to have to reassure me about yours. It's selfish. I keep telling myself I'm not going to be selfish.

[devoutish]

It's not the death she'd be reassuring you about, it's the reasons behind it.

[bywolves]

[ He brings his knees to his chest, arms around his legs. ]

The reason was me. Whether or not what Arcadius thought was true, she died because of me, Alfie.

[devoutish]

[Firmly:]

No, Royce, she did not.

[bywolves]

[ He stays quiet this time, chewing his tongue. ]

[devoutish]

Yeah. He was the selfish one; he wanted to keep your daughter.

[bywolves]

For the good of Elan. [ He mutters. ] It was supposed to be for the greater good. He didn't want her. Just wanted her to lead.

[devoutish]

Which he thought she wouldn't do if she went off with you.

[bywolves]

She wouldn't have. I would've left. I would've taken Mercy and Gwen and run - we were going to do that. He stopped us.

[devoutish]

I know, and he didn't want that. It had nothing to do with you not being good enough.

[bywolves]

[ His jaw works. ]

He killed Gwen because he wanted to mold Mercy into a perfect ruler, and he couldn't do it with me. I was ruined, so he had to start over. If I hadn't been ruined --

[devoutish]

If he thought you were ruined, then he did not fucking know you.

[bywolves]

[ Royce goes quiet. He slides one hand up and into his hair and lets out a long, unsteady sigh. ]

I wish I was as certain as you.

[devoutish]

I wish you could see yourself how I see you.