IC contact for wethelost

[devoutish]

Solomons & Melborn
1108 Sweet Cream Street

[Feel free to use this space for letter/package deliveries as well as visits/knocks on the front door!]

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[devoutish]

Come back?

[His fingers curl into Royce's shirt and tug, just a little.]

[bywolves]

[ He goes back, slowly, letting Alfie tug him wherever he wants Royce. ]

[devoutish]

[Alfie tucks him in close, curling around him as well as he can.]

If it never, hurts, mate, it's not love.

[bywolves]

[ Royce rests his head against Alfie's shoulder and stares at the wall. Dully: ]

That doesn't close the hole.

[devoutish]

I know it doesn't.

[But he doesn't know how to.]

[bywolves]

I don't know how to fix it.

[ Royce says, in that same quiet, flat tone. ] I don't know what to do anymore. Drinking didn't help.

[devoutish]

Drinking never makes sadness go away. It makes whatever you're already feeling all the more strong.

[The flatness in his voice scares him - it's too much like that eternal emotionlessness from Norfinbury. He pulls Royce closer with a shiver.]

[bywolves]

[ He doesn't know what else to do but just try to shut it out. He lets out a shivery breath, and pulls his legs in close, curled up against Alfie. He doesn't know what to say, so he doesn't. ]

[devoutish]

All the words I have for you are things that won't help.

[Alfie whispers into his hair.]

Platitudes.

[bywolves]

I know. [ Royce murmurs. ] It's alright.

I'll just have to figure it out. [ Somehow. ]

[devoutish]

But Royce--

[He sighs.]

That's my point, yeah? It's got no solution.

[bywolves]

I know. I know it has no solution. [ He snaps, without really meaning to. He grips at Alfie's shirt and kneads a bit at the fabric. ] So I have to figure out how to be okay with it and I don't know if I ever will.

[devoutish]

Keep talking to me about it. Don't decide that having to be okay with it means you've got to be quiet about it as well.

[bywolves]

I can't keep bringing it up.

[devoutish]

When it's on your mind, yes, you can.

[bywolves]

[ Royce doesn't answer that part. ]

I never used to feel like this. [ He murmurs. ] Norfinbury changed me so much.

[devoutish]

Did you not think about it at home, with Gwen and Hadrian?

[bywolves]

No. I assumed they'd die after me.

[devoutish]

Because you assumed you'd never live to your natural lifespan.

[That's a sad thought in and of itself.]

[bywolves]

Mm. I thought something would kill me far before I got to this point. When Gwen died, I was just waiting for my turn.

[devoutish]

You've got no idea how relieved I am that you don't feel that way anymore.

[bywolves]

[ He thinks he knows. He presses his face against Alfie's neck. ]

I'm glad to be here.

[devoutish]

Mm. Saved our lives, didn't it.

[bywolves]

Yeah. It did. More than just death, but. The mindset.

[ A beat. ] I keep thinking about asking Zephyr for the memories I'm missing. For everything after we left.

[devoutish]

Mm. It seems odd, to think of it working like that.

[He's not sure he buys it.]