IC contact for wethelost

[devoutish]

Solomons & Melborn
1108 Sweet Cream Street

[Feel free to use this space for letter/package deliveries as well as visits/knocks on the front door!]

Comments

[devoutish]

My family has got loads of children.

[bywolves]

[ A pause. ] Yeah.

[ But if they don't come here, or if it's just Gwen and Mercy and Royce, if Alfie goes home and can't come back, or -- there's so many different outcomes, and Royce just... shuts down the line of thought. ]

I don't want to think about it, there isn't - there isn't any point in worrying about something I won't be able to control.

[devoutish]

Okay.

[Alfie pats his arm.]

Okay. Don't worry about it, then.

[And he tries to send him some more of his calm, relaxed feelings - but it's hard to consciously block out emotions, and while Alfie is practiced at not showing them in his voice, face, and body language, he has no experience with suppressing them entirely. So that undercurrent of worry comes along for the ride again, and this time, it's more clear: a dual stream of when Gwen comes, everything will change and Royce can never know that I'm concerned about this.]

[bywolves]

[ Alfie.

Royce startles slightly, glancing up at Alfie with a sort of confused look. For a long moment he sort of just stares, taking that worry and digesting it, trying to figure out the source. What he gives back is worry and an urge to reassure, and then frowns. ]

If there are things you don't want to tell me, you'll need to make sure you keep your ability turned off. [ Royce says quietly. ]

[devoutish]

[... Well, shit. Alfie goes stock still.]

Royce.

[bywolves]

I'm not angry. [ Royce says in that same quiet tone. He sits up, and takes Alfie's wrist in his hand, fingers on Alfie's pulse. He presses forward concern and worry, without a trace of anger - maybe a bit of frustration, but. ]

You're worried it'll be different when Gwen gets here.

[devoutish]

I didn't think you'd be angry. I thought you would be like this.

[He doesn't pull his hand away, but he makes no move to touch further.]

This is not something that you should have to reassure me over, mate, and not something I will accept reassurances on. All right? And that's the end of it.

[bywolves]

[ But...

Royce doesn't pull his hand away either, but he pulls back the emotion he's pushing forward, looking just a tinge hurt. He knows Alfie's looking out for him, but there's a part of him that wishes he could be concerned without Alfie thinking it was going to break him. That's the frustration, but he smushes it down and away and shuts off his emotion entirely. It feels kind of cold.

His jaw works. He's trying to figure out what to say to this. ]

[devoutish]

[Alfie sighs, turning his hand around in Royce's so he can squeeze.]

It's not because I don't trust you.

[bywolves]

No, it's because you don't want to trouble me with it. I get it, Alfie.

[devoutish]

No. It's because you deserve this as something that's uncomplicated. Do you understand?

[bywolves]

[ Royce shakes his head. ]

But it isn't uncomplicated, and I'm not going to pretend it is when I know there is something upsetting you. You wouldn't leave it alone if our roles were reversed, here.

[devoutish]

It's not upsetting me; that's too dramatic.

[bywolves]

I felt it. [ Royce says, firmly. ] It was worry. And it weighs on you.

[devoutish]

Not as much as you think, all right; you got one little bit of it, that's all.

[bywolves]

[ Royce doesn't have his emotion sharing on, but the annoyance is clear on his face. ]

What did I say about self-sacrifice, earlier? [ You know, how it's stupid. He knows he's being a hypocrite. ]

[devoutish]

[Alfie does a disbelieving little laugh.]

Self-sacrifice. You're gonna talk to me about self-sacrifice.

[bywolves]

[ His jaw works again, and his lips twist. ]

Are you really going to fight with me about this?

[devoutish]

Yeah, I am. I don't want you fucking up your life with your wife because you're overly concerned about my feelings.

[bywolves]

Overly concerned -- fuck you.

[ And now he's angry, pulling his hand away and getting off the bed. ] I am not in the wrong here. I'm concerned and you -- do this, where you're an asshole for no reason and make me feel --

[ He considers showing him, but shakes his head and clamps his emotions harder to his chest. No, Alfie doesn't deserve to get to know, right now. ]

[devoutish]

[Alfie's fists clench at his sides. He doesn't stand, but he does sit up completely, swinging his legs over the side.]

Yes, but it's not a matter of right and wrong, is it; there isn't always a wrong side.

[bywolves]

Maybe not, but you certainly like to try and make me feel like there is a wrong side. [ Royce says, sharply. He's already moving to leave, pulling his hood up. ] I'm leaving. Clearly you don't need me to worry about you, so I'll just leave you to it. Congratulations, you've gotten your way.

[ And he'll be out the door if Alfie doesn't physically grab him. ]

[devoutish]

[He doesn't. He doesn't even try. He'll wait in the treehouse for another ten more minutes before deciding that he can't actually stand it, and then he'll stalk down himself.]

[bywolves]

[ Royce is gone, by that point. In fact, he'll be gone for the rest of the day, because of course he will. But like he always is after they butt heads, he'll be at the beach, on a big rock that looks over the ocean. His cloak is wrapped close and his hood is up, and he's brooding. Like always. ]

[devoutish]

[It takes a while for Alfie to track him down, and it's not because he doesn't have an idea of where he is. But finally, an hour or so after sunset, he shows up. He doesn't say anything, at first - he's just approaching from the distance, taking his time, aware that Royce will be able to see and hear him coming from far off.]